The President-elect is suing a pollster, The Des Moines Register, and its parent company for a poll that had him losing Iowa. Will newspaper giant Gannett capitulate under the legal pressure?

A friend of mine in the JAG recently picked up this esoteric volume, from an ancient time known as the 1960s, in a faraway galaxy called “America.”

Here’s a page:

BTW the information about Georgia is wrong: Like every other state of the Old Confederacy, Georgia prohibited interracial marriage at the time of Loving v. Virginia (1967).

These laws, which were still in force in more than a third of the United States when I was a child and she was a child in that kingdom by the sea, applied variously depending on the jurisdiction to “Negroes,” “mulattos,” “Orientals,” “Hindus,” Mongolians,” “American Indians,” “Malays,” and so forth (you can find the same categories in restrictive racial covenants, that banned the sales of real estate to the wrong sorts of potential neighbors), but not, that I’ve seen anyway, to Mexicans, Spanish, Puerto Ricans, Cubans etc.

While it’s true there were very few Hispanics/Latinos in the US in the mid-20th century compared to today, they (we) were still much more numerous at that time than all the other banned groups listed above, other than black people. (The entire Asian American population of the United States in 1950 was less than one half of one percent, i.e., less than a quarter of the Hispanic population). Why the Yellow Peril should have been canonized in this way, while the purveyors of marijuana, zoot suits, and desperados who didn’t need any stinking badges were not similarly treated, is an interesting question.

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With profound hope that the authors of the original paper do not read this.

Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Donald Trump’s pick to lead the Department of Health and Human Services, has faced scrutiny over his claims on vaccines, fluoride, nutrition, and more. The Onion fact-checks Kennedy on health. 

Claim: Fluoride is a “toxic pollutant” and “industrial waste” that should be taken out of public drinking water.

False: Water fluoridation is a completely safe way to turn the population gay.

Claim: Raw milk is good for you. 

False: We’re pretty sure he’s thinking of yogurt. 

Claim: Direct-to-consumer advertising for pharmaceuticals is harmful.

False: For many Americans, these ads are the only opportunity they have to watch a woman sea kayak with her husband. 

Claim: RFK Jr.’s health claims have proven to increase lifespans.

True: However, it is easy to beat the average Kennedy lifespan.

Claim: Lobbyists need to be removed from the healthcare process.

True: But good luck with that, big guy. 

Claim: Antidepressants cause mass shootings.

Unverified: No one will ever know what causes mass shootings, so there’s no point in even thinking about them.

Claim: Chinese citizens are far less susceptible to Covid-19 than Americans.

Partially true: With RFK Jr. in charge, pretty much everyone will be healthier than Americans.

The post Fact-Checking RFK Jr. On Health appeared first on The Onion.